NOTE: The title of this article has the words "children's church" in it, but this article isn't just about that. This article includes children's Sunday school, Sunday and Wednesday evening church Bible studies, and all other church youth events. My children are with my husband and I during Sunday school, church, Sunday and Wednesday evening church, and ALL church events. We don't use church for socialization. For that, we utilize playdates, the neighborhood kids, parks, get togethers, and visiting friends, etc. Why does my family have this stance? This article will explain it.
What does God's Word say? ...
"Only take heed to thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine eyes have seen, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life: but teach them thy sons, and thy sons' sons; Specially the day that thou stoodest before the LORD thy God in Horeb, when the LORD said unto me, Gather me the people together, and I will make them hear my words, that they may learn to fear me all the days that they shall live upon the earth, and that they may teach their children." -Deuteronomy 4:9-10
Whose job is it to teach my children? According to the Bible, it's my job.
"And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." -Deuteronomy 6:6-7
Whose job is it to teach their children about the things of God? It's the parent's job.
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." -Proverbs 22:6
It's the parent's job to train and teach their children; not the church's. When Judah would gather before the Lord, did the parents first drop their children off in nursery, or Children's Church? No:
"And all Judah stood before the LORD, with their little ones, their wives, and their children." -2 Chronicles 20:13
When Judah gathered before the Lord to hear the Scriptures read, were the children dropped off in nursery or Children's Church? No:
"And the king went up into the house of the LORD, and all the men of Judah and all the inhabitants of Jerusalem with him, and the priests, and the prophets, and all the people, both small and great: and he read in their ears all the words of the book of the covenant which was found in the house of the LORD." -2 Kings 23:2
Where were the children? Were they age-segregated off to different rooms or areas? No:
"When all Israel is come to appear before the LORD thy God in the place which he shall choose, thou shalt read this law before all Israel in their hearing. Gather the people together, men and women, and children, and thy stranger that is within thy gates, that they may hear, and that they may learn, and fear the LORD your God, and observe to do all the words of this law: And that their children, which have not known any thing, may hear, and learn to fear the LORD your God, as long as ye live in the land whither ye go over Jordan to possess it." -Deuteronomy 31:11-13
In the above Scripture, it was commanded that the children be with their parents when they gathered together to worship the Lord, and to study His Word. There are so many times in both the Old and New Testaments, where Scriptures were read aloud, and church services were held. Where were the children? They were with their families, as part of the congregation.
"I charge you by the Lord that this epistle be read unto all the holy brethren." - 1 Thessalonians 5:27
Where were the children when the Epistles and Scriptures were read aloud to "all the holy brethren?" As per Deuteronomy 31:11-13, they were right there in the congregation with everyone else.
"Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein." -Mark 10:15
Yet, there is an incorrect premise, which states that children are not able to pay attention to God's Word, unless visual and audio stimulation is involved. There is the misconception that a child cannot sit in church with his parents and understand much of what is being said. There is a misconception that children don't wish to be in church. These misconceptions are taught to children, via others believing this incorrect premise, and treating the children accordingly.
Yet, Mark 10:15 says that "whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child, he shall not enter therein." Adults and children are to be in church together, as part of the congregation. If we think children won't sit well in church, they most likely will live down to that expectation. If we expect them to sit still and behave in church, with just a little bit of training, they will live up to that expectation instead.
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." -Proverbs 22:6
Are we training our children to have respect for the things of God, or are we showing them that we don't believe that they are able to seek the Lord with their parents, and therefore must be age-segregated away from the congregation?
Did you know:
"Statistics clearly support that when parents disciple their own children, an overwhelming majority of those children remain in the faith after leaving home. However, when that job is delegated to the church staff, a similarly overwhelming majority leave the faith."
The above is an excerpt from the article called "Family Integration," at http://gracefamilyinfo.org/
"Gather the people, sanctify the congregation, assemble the elders, gather the children, and those that suck the breasts: let the bridegroom go forth of his chamber, and the bride out of her closet." -Joel 2:16
Who are gathered? The people, AND children, AND nursing babies. Worshipping the Lord, and gathering together in His name to study His Word is a family event. Families sit down together to eat dinner. Shouldn't they also partake of spiritual meat together?
Gathering together with the congregation is a special time, and I wish to spend that special time with those I love.
"And when it was evening, his disciples came to him, saying, This is a desert place, and the time is now past; send the multitude away, that they may go into the villages, and buy themselves victuals. But Jesus said unto them, They need not depart; give ye them to eat. And they say unto him, We have here but five loaves, and two fishes. He said, Bring them hither to me. And he commanded the multitude to sit down on the grass, and took the five loaves, and the two fishes, and looking up to heaven, he blessed, and brake, and gave the loaves to his disciples, and the disciples to the multitude. And they did all eat, and were filled: and they took up of the fragments that remained twelve baskets full. And they that had eaten were about five thousand men, beside women and children." -Matthew 14:15-21
The multitude followed Jesus, and He taught them. The time drew late, and they needed to eat, and food was provided. Where were the children during all of this? According to verse 21, they were there with the congregation.
Where did Jesus say that children should be? When Jesus was teaching, the disciples tried to segregate the children, but Jesus wished otherwise:
"And they brought unto him also infants, that he would touch them: but when his disciples saw it, they rebuked them. But Jesus called them unto him, and said, Suffer {allow} little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God." -Luke 18:15-16
Here is another New Testament Scripture, which shows that the children were not age segregated away, but were with their parents:
"And when we had accomplished those days, we departed and went our way; and they all brought us on our way, with wives and children, till we were out of the city: and we kneeled down on the shore, and prayed." -Acts 21:5
Some people put their children in Church youth programs so that they can socialize. Church is not for socializing, and shouldn't be viewed for such purposes. Church is a place for believers to gather in fellowship to worship, praise, and learn about the Creator. Children can socialize at potlucks, parks, play dates, visiting friends after church services are over, etc.
Kids are like sponges. They soak up the environment around them, including what is being said and taught. My children have amazed me on many occasions, by bringing up the topic of certain sermons or Bible studies from church. They listen to what is being taught.
Their minds have not been spoiled via loud music and flashy videos or puppets and such. Entertainment education carries the danger of driving the developing brain to take the path of passive learning, as opposed to active learning. When a child is trained to be a passive learner, they will need to be spoon-fed education, in the most entertaining way possible.
When a child has been brought up to be an active learner, then they are taught to seek out information for themselves, and to soak up information from the written and spoken word, with no sparkles and entertaining extras required.
Furthermore, most church youth programs follow the same, or similar educational model as public schools do, via the Dewey education system. The Dewey educational model goes against natural brain development. Its very systems and theories originated, and were designed, because of Darwinian evolution. Before Dewey, all schools followed the Trivium, or Classical Education approach, which is the natural way of education, which works perfectly with the developing brain.
By educating children via the Dewey method (the method used by most public schools and church youth programs) combined with entertainment education, the developing brain can be altered, in which the child not only learns passively, instead of actively, but also can lead a child to having an "entertain me" view of life, instead of a "how can I be a blessing to others" type of life.
I believe that it is biblical for children to be with their parents during church. Further, I believe that children's ministries, like public school, can be detrimental to a child's development, and can be a blockade in both their spiritual and academic development.
While I don't judge or look down on those who choose to utilize these programs, I choose not to utilize them, and I believe the Bible to clearly back me on this issue.
